duck-shaped pain

America's whitest woman drones on for an hour about how wonderful a wide array of the nation's most expensive houses are. Then she shows you how to made useless crafts. She's especially annoying when she talks about the Southwest, as she is one of those people from the other side of the country who seems to sincerely believe that this area is all mystical and spiritual and whatnot.

I only mention this because I just found out today that she's moving to my town. I wasn't on some sort of notify list for this information, nor did I overhear this secretly whispered while standing in line at the grocery store; I found this out because it was the largest story in today's paper. It took up a full page, complete with an enormous picture of Ms. Jennings straddling a two-by-four.

She's moving out here to raise her own cattle. Give me a break.

The area she's moving to is Glade Park, a vast plain of scrub, dirt, and cactus right outside of town; an area that seems to attract burnouts, freaks and D-list celebrities. Ricky Schroeder lives up there, too, after all.

I got my haircut today. I hoped that it would go well, having endured a bad bad haircut last time I endured the process. In the end, it ultimately turned out fine, but getting there was sort of a hassle.

I have had the same haircut since I was in middle school: a bowl cut of varying lengths. Its distinguishing feature is that I always have a lot of the hair on the back of my head shaved off. I have a lot of hair, and it helps the longer hair on top lay flat as well as keeps my neck cool in the summer. Often, I encounter resistance from hairdressers, reluctant to shave it so short (I like it really short), but usually I get what I want.

The woman I had today had just no clue as to what to do. She did a good job on the long part of my hair, but the shaving of the underside left her completely befuddled. I explained it again and again, and she didn't get it. Finally, she called over another hairdresser and had me tell her, who then explained it to the original woman. I was really grumpy by that point, as she was completely not listening to me. I still tipper her, though, because she was at least nice and apologetic about it.

I made something last night that was really good, considering that it's a recipe devised totally for lazy people and uses convenience foods. It's not as good as my homemade lasagna, but that's really expensive to make and takes forever. It is, however, much better than any frozen lasagna I've ever eaten.

I got the recipe from a friend, who read it somewhere on the internet, so it isn't mine.

Ravioli Lasagna

1 jar spaghetti sauce (I used tomato and basil, but I forget what brand)

1 bag frozen ravioli (I used cheese)

1 small box frozen chopped spinach, thawed

8 ounces or so mozzarella cheese

Parmesan cheese (however much you like)

Take a 9 by 13 inch pan, and pour half the sauce into it. Spread the sauce out so that it there is an even layer of it on the bottom of the pan. Place a single layer of ravioli (approximately half the bag) on top of the sauce. Cover the ravioli with the spinach and half the mozzarella. Place the rest of the ravioli on top of the spinach and cheese. Cover with the rest of the sauce and the rest of the cheese. Grate Parmesan on top of the lasagna as desired. Cook in a 375-degree oven for approximately an hour.

This is very fast and very good, and vegetarian to boot (or not, depending on what type of ravioli you use).

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