duck-shaped pain

I saw the worst food item ever at Sam's the other day. Little pre-fab portions of macaroni and cheese, which were then battered, deep-fried and frozen. I tried a sample of one. They were kind of flat and rectangular, and the breading was sort of grainy, so they looked more like fish sticks than anything. But then you bit into one and inside was bright orange macaroni and cheese. The box suggested that they could be on-the-go treats for busy children, like that weird yogurt that comes in a tube. As if macaroni and cheese were too difficult, or too time consuming. As if you had to get up early in the morning to make your own orange cheese powder to assure that there would be indeed macaroni and cheese for dinner. I don't think there's any food, at least any food that requires you to at least pretend to cook (supplying some of your own ingredients, adding heat, and doing some mixing, easier than macaroni and cheese. And then there's the deep-frying idea, which just seems so wrong.

I got a call this weekend about my car. I took it into the shop on Thursday morning to have it fixed. I was at home when the phone range Sunday afternoon, but I didn't get to the phone in time. I listened to my answering machine as the woman on the line said, "Hello, this is ____ Garage calling about your car. We have figured out what is wrong with it. [1] It is 4:30 on Friday afternoon, so please call us on Monday to authorize the repairs."

I thought my clock was slow. What time would she have said if I had picked up the phone?

Some people have asked what the font that I used for this page's title is. The font is called May Queen by Tom Murphy, and you can get it here (you have to scroll down a bit). [2]

[1] Spark plugs.

[2] Remind me that I'm going to have to delete that last part when I change my design next.

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